Desember 13th, 2011 by admin

As teenagers, we must also be able to manage our finances effectively. If not, then maybe the waste.

Habits of us is hard to control myself to keep spending despite the fact that our income barely adequate. So if we really care about our financial condition … must we be surprised when we find out that the expenditure was far greater than income. No matter what amount of your income … if you can not with good financial governance and discipline … then you will fail. Further consider the following article:

The first rule if you want to succeed financially is to spend less money than earned income. If you can not do that, you will never succeed in finance. No matter how hard you are, no matter how much time you spend working, no matter how many opportunities you receive, or how much money he could earn you … .. you will fail in mengeola your finances!

This is a simple rule, and most people accept as rules that make sense. But in reality many people have no savings and lots of debt, meaning the rules are not adhered to this nonsense.

Here are 10 reasons that make a person’s excessive spending, and this might also happen to me and you.

1. Keeping the status in the eyes of others

Psychological factors play a big role in our spending habits. We want to feel successful or more successful than the people around us. We spend a lot of money to keep that image in their eyes. Yet in reality these people also can not buy as purchased by us in an all-out.

2. Avoiding reality

It is easy to spend money unnecessarily if we forget our bill accounts. Most people are unaware of the real situation of their finances because they are afraid to observe the chaos that actually happened. And it becomes easier for a while to avoid it. They will pay a minimum payment of credit card and then add more usage or open a new loan and then ignore the overall amount of debt that continues to grow.

3. Counting the money will definitely not be accepted

Many of us spend reserve money or borrow some money and hope to get another in exchange. For example there are rumors about the year-end bonus that has not been the truth, or THR with a certain amount. We are often too optimistic about the money that will come next. The money was spent before received, and finally – and this often happens – there are not as much has been spent.

4. Money is not the same plastic taste with real money

In general, we will be spending excessive time using a credit card than with cash. When we use a credit card and then handed the card back by the cashier to us after use, not the same as it was when we spend some cash and find the money in our wallets has been reduced. Credit cards remain intact unless the credit limit is met, while cash can be vanished.

5. Immediate gratification

All this is about the fundamental nature of us. We have been bombarded by the mentality which wanted to settle immediately. Such as “Painkillers quickly”, “fast food”, or any advertising message “buy now, pay later”. If we still behave like that mentally, we will continue to be used by manufacturers because we always want what we want right now, without going to know how we’ll pay for it.

6. Increased lifestyle

Many people experience an increase in the cost of living as their income increases. But nothing ever happens the same thing when a decline in revenue. If we are accustomed to a certain lifestyle, then it is very difficult to bring it down, even if our financial situation deteriorated.

7. Weak like children

Perhaps there is still a childish nature we can never hold money in a long time because it can not stand the temptation and always eager to spend it, or the lack of financial understanding to be a reason we spend money excessively.

8. Feelings of power

Spending money often makes people feel strong and powerful. The more they shop, the more strong and powerful taste, and the only way to return a sense of power mendapatan is to spend more money again.

9. Proving self-esteem

Someone who buys a new car dream of many people, for example, will find it has proved that he was already a successful person. Because for some people what he had bought a measure of appreciation of others towards them.

10. Can not say no

Some people feel like a failure when they can not meet the wishes of others. For example, expensive new toys that her children are very desirable, new home appliances which are very desirable wife, or an outing out with old friends. Some people find it difficult to say no, even when they can not meet even once.

Desember 13th, 2011 by admin

Teenagers are now more daring city premarital sexual intercourse. It seems it is related to the results of a study, 10-12% of adolescents in Jakarta sexual knowledge was lacking.This suggests sex education for children and adolescents, especially intensively at home and at school, the more important.

Knowledge is half-half was more dangerous than no idea at all. These wise words also seem to apply to teenagers about sex knowledge though in this case ignorance does not mean less harmful. Data collected dr. Boyke Dian Nugraha, DSOG, obstetricians and content of the RS Dharmais disease, showed 16-20% of adolescents who consult him had premarital sex. In his notes the number of cases it tends to rise; the beginning of the 1980s that figure ranges from 50-10%.

Meanwhile, Dra. Yulia S. Singgih Gunarsa, psychologist and counselor at a private school in Jakarta, also saw many couples teen phenomenon associated with abortion services brokers in Central Jakarta and the use of birth control drugs.

The data may not represent the actual reality, which could indicate a number higher or lower. But at least the case of premarital sexual relations it has to do with the results of a study of doctors in Jakarta. As quoted Boyke, 10-12% of adolescents in Jakarta sexual knowledge was lacking.

In regard to sexual relations, can be taken any example youth who argue, if only once intercourse, no pregnancy will occur. Or, hopping or shower thoroughly immediately after sexual intercourse could prevent pregnancy.

Knowledge of sex that only a half-half not only encourage teenagers to experiment, but also can lead to incorrect perceptions. For example, kissing or swim in the pool that is “tainted” sperm can result in pregnancy, wet dreams mistaken for a dirty disease, discouraged because of small penis size, frequent masturbation can cause impotence.

Some are certainly due to the occurrence of abortion is concerned with various risks, young family couples divorce, or the spread of sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV which is now languishing in the bodies of hundreds of people in Indonesia. Compare with the findings of Marlene M. Maheu, Ph.D., a psychologist who practices in California, USA, that every year there is one of 18 U.S. teen girls get pregnant before marriage and 1 of 5 patients infected with HIV-AIDS in the teenage years.

Yelled at by parents
Seeing the fact that, intensive sex education from an early age to adolescence could not negotiable. Especially considering, “The majority of AIDS transmission occurs through sexual contact,” said Boyke are also caregivers consultation rubric of sex in magazines and radio. If not, they are now teenagers can not do much when entering the productive age in the coming XXI century.

As quoted Boyke, a survey by the WHO about proving sex education, sex education can reduce or prevent indiscriminate sexual behavior, which means it also reduces the transmission of diseases caused by free sex.

Mentioned also, correct sex education should include elements of human rights. Also the values ​​of culture and religion are included in it so it would be a good character and moral education as well. With divorce rates that are expected unfavorable impact on children can be reduced.

Only the matter until now, “Sex education in Indonesia is still controversial. There are still many members of the public who have not agreed to sex education at home and at school, “said dr. Gerard Paat, kolsultan Sint Carolus Hospital family.

Even for educational purposes, the presumption taboo to talk about sex is still stuck in the minds of some people. As a result, children who leave teenagers rarely get sufficient stock of knowledge of sex from parents (parents). Though it is rarely the teens themselves took the initiative to ask, but it is often greeted with “anger” parent. ”Boro-boro want ngejelasin about sex, just a little nanya wrote, nyokap (mother) has mbentak, ‘Hey it’s taboo, do not diomongin!’” I was a teenager.

Even children that both parents are working an average loss of role models. ”Parents are supposed to be the main role model, it is less busy because of their own role,” said dr.Paat, who since the late 1960s provide sex education in schools and outside schools.

Movies, books, and motels
The impact could be anywhere. Among others in choosing the consumption of the spectacle on TV are still heavy with western movie with other cultures and different lifestyles. Life of the western world portrayed in the film or video, according to Boyke, often showing the life of free sex among teenagers. Impressions series range of Beverly Hills or Bay Watch, Boyke cite an example, with stars comely and handsome it easy to penetrate into the minds of teenagers. So that they can be very easy to imitate the lifestyle of young people in the movie.

“It’s when such information can not be avoided, the role of parents to provide a correct understanding in children is important,” said Boyke.

The lack of sexual knowledge are compounded by the easy to get the infrastructure to perform such free sex at the motel, cottage, villa; contraceptives; more young girls get the average period (9-11 years); and delayed age of marriage. All were also factors that influence adolescent sexual activity is free and cohabiting.

Unfortunately, “Teenagers who are used to hold a sexual relationship would be difficult to stop it,” explains Paat. It’s not solely because of an addiction, but mainly due to the emergence of the perception that sexual intercourse is a normal thing.

If that happens, parents must share responsibility. ”The parents should first of all provide sex education for their children. Sex information from friends, movies, or books, which is only half-half with no direction, it is easy to plunge. Especially if the child does not know the risk of premarital sexual relations, “said Boyke.

According to Paat, passive sex education, because without such a two-way communication, it can affect a person’s attitudes and behavior. ”In the sex education of children is not enough to just see and hear once or twice, but it must be gradual and sustained,” he said. Therefore, sex education should be an important part in education in schools. Parents and educators must correct incorrect information with a written description of risk sexual behavior is wrong.

However, sex education in school sex education should only complement the house. Not exactly a major such as occurs during this time, although sex education in schools, according to some analysts said, still not optimal.

Courtship should not forbidden
Provision of sex education at home should be done early and begins with the everyday behavior of children. When still a child for example, give meaning to them not out of the bathroom while naked, shut the bathroom door when taking a bath, first knocking on the door before entering the room parents.

When it stepped on elementary school, girls in particular, must have been already prepared to face during puberty. At the age of about 14 years, young women and men on average begin to want to know everything about the opposite sex. ”It’s a maturation process itself, and can not be prevented,” said Boyke. This is where parents must begin to more often hold approach and incorporate moral values ​​to children.

By the time they started dating at that age is enough, said Boyke, no need to forbid prohibited. Dating is an exercise maturity and emotional maturation. By dating they can feel a sense of longing or a sense of belonging, and practicing how to air-sharing with a partner. At this time parents should play teenage girls become friends while discussing who the boyfriend was examined.

In this case it takes more open communication between parent-child. Through communication, which are often much neglected role, parents can put things that should and should not be done. For example, their limits may be making out and what the consequences if the limit is breached. The trust of parents will make them more responsible.

Dating in secret due to not trust it not be profitable. ”Remember, the cases of premarital pregnancy is generally done by those who back street,” said Boyke. ”It might be due to a relationship with a parent or parents are less familiar too rigid.”

Dr. Paat and dr. Boyke states, an explanation of the risk of premarital sexual relations need to be emphasized. For example, pregnancy, HIV infection or the possibility of contracting venereal disease if bergonta couples. In the event of pregnancy and had aborted womb, they face the possibility of bleeding, infection, sterility, even death. Not to mention the stress or guilt will be facing the child. Also be reminded, with their children born out of wedlock, they also must be responsible as a father and mother. Do not forget also, “Take care that their souls are not much disturbed, especially as long as they are still immature, still have school, and others,” added Julia.

Anytime, anywhere
A good explanation is able to open their eyes how premarital sexual relations that it is pointless. This is for instance evident when dr. Boyke distribute questionnaires to seminar participants adolescents. Their answers before and after listening to lectures opposites.Before the seminar, they averaged approve of sexual relations before marriage. But afterward, 90% of participants disagree. Also revealed, they agree that education is sex, just do not know where to get it.

Delivery of sex education materials in the home should be done both parents. ”Before the age of 10 years of education can be given alternately, but generally women are more involved,” said Paat. Towards puberty, when it’s a process of differentiation of sex and shame began to emerge (in women experiencing menstruation, breast growth, and in men have wet dreams and voice changes), the mother should give an explanation to the daughter and father to son -men. ”Once upon a time cross-channel may be held. For example, the daughter of a father can discuss how feelings of men when in love, or otherwise to his son, the mother can express how you feel when a woman approached him. ”

Explaining about sex also do not need exclusively. That can be done anytime and anywhere. While we were busy cooking, for instance, suddenly the child asked about pregnancy. The mother does not need to suspend an answer or promise the answer will be given at length in the room, but can be directly on the spot. Exclusive action, according to Paat, the child can even make a conclusion, sex is something extraordinary and should be kept secret. Though such questions are commonplace and part of his life.

“If our children had never been asked about sex, certainly not thought wrong. Try pancinglah with books, “explained Paat. ”Details in the book are unclear can be discussed with parents,” added Boyke.

In the RT can
Sex education in schools, according to Yulia and Paat, should not be separated from education in general, and are integrated. He can be incorporated into the lessons of biology, health, morals and ethics are gradually and continuously. They also require an emphasis on moral education, although not necessary as detailed as religious education, so that sex education received by students as a science that is not to be practiced ahead of time.

Once upon a time sex counseling should also be held. For example, about to face periods and wet dreams could be given to sixth grade elementary school children, the process of baby (sperm meets the egg cells) begins to be given to junior secondary school pupils.Furthermore, the issue of freedom of sex, contraception until sex (not technique) is given to high school kids.

According to Yulia, an explanation of sex education programs that were trying to convey to the students should also know the parents. That is, so they could give an answer and was not surprised when all of a sudden the child or teen asks about sex to them. ”Because, sometimes there are children who so proudly talks about the new sex education provided in schools,” said Yulia.

Dr. Paat and dr. Boyke disagree with each other in the matter of delivery of information about contraception. ”Contraceptives kinds of condoms is not a secret anymore, because it can be bought everywhere. Importantly, they were given an explanation that the use of before marriage is a violation of moral values ​​and religion, “said Paat. While Boyke less agreed to introduce its use to the youth, for fear of misuse.

More precisely, said Paat, if the theme of education is based on problem-solving approaches (problem solving approach), the extension along the opportunity to consult with teachers, school psychology consultant, or teacher of religion. Because the problems faced by every student is different.

In this case Dra. Yulia considers important role of teachers, guidance and counseling (BP). These teachers not only as a guidance counselor, but also must know about sex education. ”Sometimes students hesitate to ask parents. Or, even scolded once asked the father or mother, “said Yulia. With the opportunity to consult, the child can express his personal problems.

However sex education is not solely the responsibility of parents and educators, but also society.